Things I’ve Thunk: Inc. Plenty about football

• My message stating my reluctance to write more blog posts, at least before the summer, ended up being completely pointless. Look what’s happened! I now have more of a sense of direction with this shit.
• Wayne Rooney may have deserved his ban for swearing several times at a camera (and microphone, obviously) but why was he not banned earlier in the season for a blatantly deliberate elbow?! Baffling.
• I really wish it had been possible for there to have been a camera present at the best moments of life, ‘cause looking back at my school history, I have very little to look back on; yet the memories are amazing…
• How GUTTED must Jose Mourinho be after throwing away his 9 year home unbeaten record?!
• I’d love to be in a band, despite not possessing the relevant skills necessary on vocals or any form of musical instrument. Backing dancer?
• The apostrophe is dead. Say hello to a world of illiteracy.
• ‘Stare at my ass for long enough and it will turn into a gorilla.’ ‘Stare at his ass for long enough and it will turn into a gorilla.’
• Norwich City FC’s promotion chances. Pretty good I’d say, and to be honest they should comfortably reach the play-off places. But with a quite tricky late season run in, will they be able to rack up enough points to achieve promotion automatically? I hope so.
• And if that does happen, my beloved Swansea City will have to settle for a play-off spot. Fine, well done to them if they do make it, but they were in the driving seat for second place up until pretty recently…shame.
• Failure at Liverpool taken into account, Roy Hodgson is still definitely one of the nicest people in football.
• I need to start eating some fruit, so I’m now gorging on a bowl of strawberries. Well, with cheesecake…
• Gorleston is a shit-hole…(something obvious next time please?)
• Somehow in our circle (probably more like an oval…) of Morrison’s going friends, the definition of a ‘man crush’ has become somewhat cloudy. Incredible.
• I wish Will Ferrell would take off his shoes and suck me se-…just watch Semi-Pro…